By Tammy L. Smith
Guest Columnist
Our world has grown accustomed to communicating through technology.
Real meaningful communication has been replaced with little to no face-to-face interaction or talking with other human beings. Words shortened or replaced with acronyms or emojis sent via text are now the norm. Getting to learn about others or asking questions to learn interests has been replaced by checking their Facebook posts and pics instead.
There is a whole generation that I fear may never know the art of conversation. Some of you may remember conversations in the days before cell phones, you know where people were sitting around together, making eye contact and exchanging words, asking questions and learning about one another.
This Thanksgiving, I decided to try to bring that lost art back. With a little creativity and some Post-It notes, I developed what I called “phone free family time.” I simply thought up and wrote questions on the Post-It notes and placed them in a tin.
On Thanksgiving I bravely announced that everyone would need to put their cell phones down for a few minutes. I’m still here to write this, so no one was harmed, and we all survived without phones for this activity.
We took turns drawing a question, reading it aloud, answering it, and the others answered it. Then the next person pulled a question, and we all answered. These were simple questions, like, “Where was your favorite place you visited?” or “ What is a food you didn’t think you would like, but now you do?”
The highlight was when my youngest nieces were able to read the questions to us. My tween niece didn’t part with her phone but did take part when it was her turn, which we were happy getting an almost-teenager to think this activity was worth participating in. So we’re counting that as a success.
From ages almost 7 to almost 77, we all had fun and enjoyed many laughs together. We even learned new things about each other. When we ran out of questions, the youngest was disappointed, as she wanted to keep answering questions. I can’t think of a better way of gauging the success of this activity.
We enjoyed it so much that for Christmas, we are all going to bring questions to ask to keep this going. To test out the success further, I also tried asking questions of my grandsons, age 9 and almost 13. I was happy to find that they too enjoyed asking questions and hearing each other’s answers. The youngest too kept asking for more questions, so I will be sure to come up with more for him.
A few days ago, my young niece told me, “I really liked that game we played on Thanksgiving,” reassuring me that children do want conversations. We as adults just need to initiate and encourage them, and what better way than making a game of it?
To share the refound joy of conversations with others, I am sending our questions to my brother and his family out of state so they too can spread hope of renewed togetherness through what the children think of as a new fun game. I have renamed it “conversation” so that, as long as we continue playing, the art of conversation continues on too.
So for those who also worried that the future will not involve talking face to face, now you too can have hope that talking will not be lost. But remember we must be examples, so I encourage you to try this activity. I am certain that our family will be doing their part continuing this “game” that they now love, and perhaps it will lead to more activities without phones if even for a few minutes.
I’m wishing you holidays and a future full of togetherness and conversations.
Tammy Smith lives in Lima. Her column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Lima News editorial board or AIM Media, owner of The Lima News.
