Most of us will celebrate our one mother as part of Mother’s Day, and rightfully so. But perhaps we should ponder the impact of mothers as a collective and their remarkable ability to help.
We were beneficiaries of this thoughtfulness when we brought our first foster children into our home. A few women saw us in church with two extra children, and they began sizing them up, literally. Within a few days, they gathered up clothes and toys appropriate for these children, simply to help a mother out.
We’ve tried to be on the giving end of it too, when we hear about someone in need of clothes or toys for a child, and we realize we have some clothes of that size in totes in our basement, just in case someone needs them some day.
There’s something remarkable about a mother in her urge to help children — not just their children, but anyone’s children.
It’s a lesson in generosity I just can’t comprehend personally. I see the world as having a small number of children who are mine and a much larger pool of kids who just aren’t my problem. A couple of rounds through the foster care system have opened my eyes and my heart a bit, but in my mind most children still aren’t my concern.
The mothers in my world see it differently. Every baby is one they want to hold. Every need becomes their problem if they can easily solve it. It doesn’t take a village to raise a child; it takes a village full of mothers.
I don’t want to shortchange the value of fathers. We do some things, but they’re generally self-serving. I may help coach the softball team for my 8-year-old and 9-year-old daughters, but that isn’t because I felt a void in the lives of those other girls. I do it because I get something out of it, time with my children.
Most mothers are driven out of the instinct to care for a child. They want every kid to have a chance. They somehow have an unlimited amount of love and compassion in them, not just for their children but for the other children that cross their paths.
They’re not suckers. If they feel their generosity is being abused, they cut off all help at a moment’s notice.
Despite portrayals of women as vicious and catty, my experiences are quite the opposite. I’m more likely to keep score of these debts than any mother I’ve observed. Their motivations aren’t paybacks; they’re love.
In some circles, there are complaints about the feminization of men. I’m more worried about the masculinization of women. We should celebrate this inherent goodness in mothers and try to follow their model. They care enough about the people around them to try to make their lives better, in whatever small way they can.
Be sure to thank all the mothers in your life today.
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