Congratulations, kids! You’ve survived another year of school. Now you get three months of rest and relaxation as a reward for a hard year of learning.
My condolences, parents! You’ve survived another year of school, and now it’s time for the hard part: Summer vacation. Three months of unscheduled time for your kids can be daunting.
When these two points of view come together, there’s often strife. As Will Smith said in a rap (you can Google it, kiddies; he used to rap too): “Parents just don’t understand.”
To bridge these two perspectives, I’ve asked my three school-age children to help me assemble a tip sheet for the parents. Here are five things children really don’t want to hear this summer:
•“When I was your age …” There’s no doubt you did some incredible things with your summers as a kid. You cured cancer in your spare time. You perfectly manicured your parents’ lawn. You built that addition to the house.
Or, perhaps, you memorized the plots to every episode of “The Brady Bunch” and “Gilligan’s Island.” If I’m honest about it, that’s how I spent my summers as a kid.
Sure, I spent some of my days playing outside, swimming and biking around. My parents pushed me to do those things. I shouldn’t be surprised if my kids need a little nudge too.
•“I need you up by 7. Go to bed early tonight.” We complain about kids growing up too fast in today’s society. Let them sleep a little. Let them stay up a little late. Let them enjoy summer.
I don’t know many people who welcome the sound of an alarm clock, yet it’s a reality for the duration of your working life. Let them enjoy the fact their “job” takes a few months off. Hopefully they’ll recognize how truly beautiful an Ohio sunset can be by being up to see it.
•“I have a day full of chores for you.” Don’t misunderstand this one, parents. Kids want to help around the house, even if they don’t want to tell you that. Deep down inside, they want to be helpful. (Until they’re teens. Then they delight in not being helpful. It’s a cruel irony, that when they’re most capable of helping, they’re the least willing.)
You should take advantage of this, but not with day-long tasks. They need time to play and enjoy their summers. Give them short, achievable jobs that leave plenty of time for play.
•“It’s too cold to swim.” Unless there’s ice in the water, it’s not too cold for them. Around here, the only chance they’ll get to swim under the sun is June-July-August.
There are always ways to mitigate this fight. The hottest time of day, statistically speaking, is around 3 p.m. Let them swim when it’s the warmest. It also will give the water a chance to heat up if we have one of those cool Ohio June mornings.
•“I bet you’re ready to go back to school.” That’s transference, Moms and Dads. You might be ready, but they probably aren’t until August at the earliest.
How would you react if you took a week’s vacation, and someone suggested on Tuesday that you’re probably ready to return to work? You’re doing the same thing when you say the S-word before August.
Parents, good luck. It can be exhausting to try to keep the spirits high in your house through a long summer break. Your parents survived with you, and you can do the same with your children.
Kids, have a wonderful summer. Listen to your parents. They’re definitely jealous of your three months of leisure time.
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