Letter: The Sultan of Soak

Mike Caprella, Lima Director of Utilities, recently announced the construction of the underground storage tank at Simons Field will soon be completed. He noted that it was completed under budget and earlier than the schedule allowed for.

This is quite commendable, but there were some items that I heard never made the budget report. Rumors are that a large amount of shag carpet, quite a few lava lamps, and one enormous disco ball were used in the outfitting of this tank. Could it be that Mike is planning an escape house away from the downtown mirrored tower where he currently rules from?

I know that since we all have the new electronic water meters that he can shut me off with the flip of a switch, but as a civic-minded citizen, I felt that I needed to pass these rumors on even if it meant I might have to dry shave every morning for years to come.

So in the future if you walk through the lovely green gross of Simons Field and you hear the faint sound of Saturday Night Fever disco music permeating up through the ground, you may just wonder what is going on down there?

Mike Flynn, Lima


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