I was reminded this morning why I had removed The Lima News from being a source of my news information several years ago.
You see, I was in a pinch for a crossword puzzle and no breakfast is worthwhile without one, and The Lima News was all that was available at the little store.
Before starting the puzzle and placing my order at the restaurant, I scanned your product. Here’s what I found:
1. America’s influence, once so dominant, waning under Trump (Unadulterated AP garbage.)
2. Barr shouldn’t threaten places questioning cops (Unadulterated Tampa Bay Times garbage.)
3. Ukrainian incident similar to 2016 (Unadulterated Washington garbage.)
At this point, I carefully placed The Lima News in the restaurant’s front room trash container, explained my reason for doing so to my friends, and then bid farewell without either puzzle or breakfast. I promise to never waste another dollar on this so-called “newspaper,” I promise.
I didn’t even get to read the comics.