David Trinko: Thanksgiving with Clyde Prime, the Amazon guy


By David Trinko - The Lima News



ONLY ON LIMAOHIO.COM

See past columns by David Trinko at LimaOhio.com/tag/trinko.

Thursday marks the unofficial start of the Christmas shopping season.

Thank goodness the retailers told us when we should start spending our money on each other.

Of course, so many of them started putting their decorations out right after Halloween. That means we jump right from Halloween to Christmas in our culture, the same way that we jump right from summer weather to winter weather, with about three days of autumn around here.

Lest you think I have no holiday spirit, I’d like to introduce you to a new holiday hero, Clyde Prime, the Amazon guy. He’s the mythical guy who takes your order, finds your stuff and boxes it up. You’ve heard the song, sung to the tune of “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer,” right?

You know Dasher and Dancer

and Prancer and Vixen.

Frosty and Buddy

and even elf Steven.

But do you recall

the most epic seller of all?

Clyde Prime, the Amazon guy,

had a very cool website.

And if you buy from it

you would say it’s often right.

All of the other shoppers

used to drive and go to stores.

They never shopped online,

sleeping with lots of snores.

Then one big Thanksgiving Day

all the stores stayed open.

‘People with your cash so green,

why don’t you check out our scene.’

Then all the shoppers realized

it’s better than spending wisely:

“Clyde Prime, the Amazon guy,

we’ll stay home with family!”

https://www.limaohio.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/54/2019/11/web1_Trinko-David-2018-RGB-4.jpg

By David Trinko

The Lima News

ONLY ON LIMAOHIO.COM

See past columns by David Trinko at LimaOhio.com/tag/trinko.

David Trinko is managing editor of The Lima News. Reach him at 567-242-0467, by email at dtrinko@limanews.com or on Twitter @Lima_Trinko.

David Trinko is managing editor of The Lima News. Reach him at 567-242-0467, by email at dtrinko@limanews.com or on Twitter @Lima_Trinko.

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