Real Life Mama: Daughters react differently to change in Mama’s car


By Sarah Shrader - Guest columnist



Reagan told me that she named my car so it was family now and we absolutely could not get rid of it. On the other hand, Maylie was ecstatic about a new car – a fresh beginning with all the fun gadgets that came along with it. She was giddy and could not wait for the change.

Reagan told me that she named my car so it was family now and we absolutely could not get rid of it. On the other hand, Maylie was ecstatic about a new car – a fresh beginning with all the fun gadgets that came along with it. She was giddy and could not wait for the change.


This week, I got a new car. No, not like a brand-new car – I am not made of money – but a new-to-me car. And guys, I haven’t had a new (to me) car since Maylie was a toddler and Reagan was on the way and I had no choice but to get something with a backseat that could fit two rear-facing car seats. So, to say I was excited would be an understatement.

Look, this Mama has been more than fine without a car payment, but I had been so frustrated with limiting the number of kiddos I could take to – well, anywhere. On any given weekend, we are hitting football games, church, parks – whatever the adventure is. And, let’s be honest, there is never a shortness of kids hanging around my house who want to join us. Plus, my girls always want to bring a friend.

That always posed a problem; I only have three seats in my back seat, and most of these babies are not old enough to sit in the front yet. I needed a bigger vehicle.

I mean, that was the main reason, but not the only one. Who doesn’t want a back-up camera, heated seats and – oh yeah – a DVD player for longer trips to entertain the girls? I know most people probably have all of these nowadays but for those of us who don’t (or didn’t), they are a big deal!

So, when a vehicle came up in the right price range and checked off all of the boxes, I was pumped. After looking at the car, driving it and falling in love, I could not wait to tell my babies about it.

What happened next surprised me.

Reagan was distraught. Absolutely in no way, shape or form was she giving up my car. It was not happening. Guys, I have written about my mom ride before – it is nothing great and clearly always a disaster. But, this poor babe told me that she named my car so it was family now and we absolutely could not get rid of it.

With tears in her eyes, Reagan advised me that she would give me all of her money if we could just keep it. Even after I explained that we could have friends join us more often, watch movies in the back and they had their very own sunroof, she was still willing to give me every penny in her piggy bank to keep it around.

Talk about a gut punch. Here I was super excited and trying to do something better for us and all my sweet girl wanted was nothing to change.

On the other hand, Maylie was ecstatic about a new car – a fresh beginning with all the fun gadgets that came along with it. She was giddy and could not wait for the change.

And my babies portrayed the exact depiction of change and all its variances over a vehicle. While it was a big adult and financial decision, I was shocked at the different reactions that my girls had over changing cars.

That’s the thing about change – it can be so many different things. Change can be hard, yet it can be beautiful. Change could be exciting, but it could be scary. Change may be sought after, although it also may not be wanted. Change usually means letting go in sadness or grabbing on to the difference in delight.

But the one thing is for sure, whether or not it is that eventually you have to upgrade your ride, change is inevitable. It is a part of life and will, as long as we are breathing, be something we have to manage through. Sometimes, our thoughts on change will align with Maylie and mine — excitement and optimism, and sometimes it looks like Reagan’s and leaving behind a carload of memories. Regardless, it is going to happen.

So, I took Reagan to look at the car with me – again explaining all the benefits of the new vehicle. We compromised on taking her favorite sticker off of my old car window and placing it on the new one’s window (I mean, may as well start the mom mobile, right?). Then, together, we said our goodbyes to my old car.

Guys, I am telling you that I never in a million years dreamed that this would be part of parenting, but I am completely open to the idea of dealing with the thoughts and feelings of my kids in whatever means that may be.

So yes, I may have talked to my old car this week to work through changes with my 6-year-old, but look out, because for the next 3-5 days I have a new ride that hasn’t yet been destroyed by said child. And I have a feeling that we will all grow into loving our new change.

https://www.limaohio.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/54/2021/10/web1_Shrader-Sarah-CMYK.jpg
Reagan told me that she named my car so it was family now and we absolutely could not get rid of it. On the other hand, Maylie was ecstatic about a new car – a fresh beginning with all the fun gadgets that came along with it. She was giddy and could not wait for the change.
https://www.limaohio.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/54/2021/10/web1_IMG_5226.jpegReagan told me that she named my car so it was family now and we absolutely could not get rid of it. On the other hand, Maylie was ecstatic about a new car – a fresh beginning with all the fun gadgets that came along with it. She was giddy and could not wait for the change.

By Sarah Shrader

Guest columnist

Sarah (Pitson) Shrader was born and raised in Lima. She is a Lima Central Catholic and Tiffin University graduate. Sarah is a full-time working mama who enjoys writing about her somewhat crazy, always adventurous life as a mother. She lives in Bath Township with her daughters and writing inspirations, Maylie and Reagan.

Sarah (Pitson) Shrader was born and raised in Lima. She is a Lima Central Catholic and Tiffin University graduate. Sarah is a full-time working mama who enjoys writing about her somewhat crazy, always adventurous life as a mother. She lives in Bath Township with her daughters and writing inspirations, Maylie and Reagan.

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