Beverly Hills Chihuahua — PG

The story

Chloe, a pampered chihuahua (voice of Drew Barrymore), lives luxuriously in Beverly Hills. Super-rich Vivian (Jamie Lee Curtis) indulges Chloe with gourmet food, designer outfits and a Harry Winston diamond collar. Vivian's feckless niece Rachel (Piper Perabo) reluctantly agrees to dog-sit Chloe while Aunt Viv travels, but loses the valuable dog in Mexico. Chloe discovers how other dogs live - from gangster-run dog fighting to homeless life on the street - as she tries to make her way back to Los Angeles.

Will gangsters get Chloe's diamonds? Can Delgado the German shepherd (Andy Garcia) protect Chloe? Does love-struck working-class chihuahua Papi (George Lopez) stand a chance with snooty Chloe? Will hunky landscaper Sam (Manolo Cardona) and ditzy Rachel get together? Guess.

Actors

Drew Barrymore, Andy Garcia and George Lopez are the voices of the principal canine characters. Barrymore is Chloe, a one-note character until late in the movie when she "discovers her bark." By then, street smart and self-reliant, she joins the chihuahua liberation movement. Charismatic Monte (Placido Domingo) leads the movement. Andy Garcia is the voice of Delgado, former police dog who's fallen on hard times. He's a noir character, world-weary and philosophical. "A promise is a promise," he says as he agrees to help Chloe get home. George Lopez is smooth-talking, smitten chihuahua Papi.

Piper Perabo, Manolo Cardona and Jamie Lee Curtis play human characters. Perabo and Cardona search for missing Chloe, while growing fonder of each other. Curtis appears at the beginning and end of the film in a role that doesn't engage her comic talents. Cheech Marin and Paul Rodriguez voice CGI con-animals and Edward James Olmos is Diablo the vicious Doberman.

Other comments

"Beverly Hills Chihuahua" has not much going for it except 200 dogs in the cast and occasional unexpected plot twists. Analisa LaBianco and Jeff Bushell's script is the problem. It is unrelentingly unfunny. Lame one-liners pass for humor. "Watch out," says Chico the CGI iguana, "Where there's a piñata, there's a stick." "Say it, don't spray it," says Chloe to Diablo. "What am I, Lassie?" says Delgado. Even kids in the audience failed to see the humor. To amuse adults, Papi says, "I love the smell of dirt in the morning."

"Chihuahua" is a Disney reworking of its deservedly classic "Lady and the Tramp" (1955). Chloe is Lady. Papi and Delgado play Tramp. My advice? Rent "Lady and the Tramp." "Chihuahua" is PG for mild innuendos. Running time, 91 minutes plus 10 minutes from upcoming animated Disney film "Bolt." It looks funny and smart - unlike "Chihuahua."

Final words

Children and adults,

No one need go,

I wouldn't send a dog

To this dog of a show.